Sunday, November 18, 2012

A New Beginning

Sometimes you don't know where to begin.

Today is that moment.

I have lurked on blogs for nearly 2 years, while silently struggling myself. I began my infertility journey like most. We were optimistic and wanted to waste no time.

We waited, what seemed like years, to find one another and when we did it was magical. Life took some turns and I spent a year or so on myself. I got to a healthy state both physically and emotionally. TTC seemed somewhat contrite. Normal periods, ovulation cues each month, never used any OCPs in my life to persevere my natural state.

 And then, nothing happened.

 So we used the only thing we knew we had..our brains. We sought help from an amazing place and soon learned that all of our testing was normal. given great chances we began. natural iui, clomid iui, 3 medicated iuis, hyster/lap, shg, 4 ivf, 1 FET and nothing. completely nothing. which is how i feel today. like my insides are bare to the world and nothing makes sense.

 I gained strength from those blogs i read but soon most stories did not match mine. answers were found, success was had. I am hoping that the world will be as kind to me as I continue on my journey and ask you to follow. I promise to be honest and faithful. This will be my space to write what I need to. I have kept this journey relatively private from those closest to me as it has felt easier that way. I now would like those who do it and get it to maybe listen. Thank you for reading, the journey is still in progress.

32 comments:

  1. I wish nothing but the best on your journey from this point forward. Since you are a new blogger, you should sign up for ICOMLEAVWE. It is filled with other bloggers and will help you get some other followers that can relate with what you are going through. IF you go to my page, you will find it at top right hand corner. Click on icon and follow directions on their page.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I look forward to following along your journey - I am sorry for the struggles and heartaches you and your husband have faced. I always love when I come to read a story of hope - and I admire your determination and your will to keep on keepin' on. You will be in my thoughts and prayers! Wishing you all the best and sending love.
    Happy Thanksgiving!
    Xo
    Maria

    ReplyDelete
  3. Maria

    thank you for the comment and the support. I must say my husband and I love your blog. your pics of your loved ones and your food! your story inspires so many. thank you for the prayers. we will be headed into ivf number 5 (all if one year..crazy i know) and we need all of the support possible.

    Happy Holidays!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi from ICLW...I wish you much luck on your journey

    ReplyDelete
  5. Welcome to blogging! I look forward to reading about your journey :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Welcome to blogging and welcome to ICLW!
    I'm wishing you all the best and sending you positive vibes for your next IVF. I found you comment on my blog very (!) inspiring! Thank you so much!
    Xoxo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you! i appreciate the positive vibes!

      Delete
  7. Hello from ICLW! I genuinely hope that you find this space to be helpful to you, as I know mine has for me. Best of luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Greetings from ICLW and welcome to the blogosphere!

    Blogging is the most amazing free therapy ever... I promise you'll find gals that have nearly identical stories to yours.. They're out there.

    Keep up the writing! ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i love it..free therapy! i cant wait to connect with others!

      Delete
  9. Hello from ICLW! I am glad you decided to start blogging about your experience, and I hope you find some answers soon. We are all here to support each other :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i feel the support..this process is already amazing!

      Delete
  10. HI from ICLW! Blogging is what has kept me sain this past year I am rooting for you!
    Alexis~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you..and my ths are with you as well!

      Delete
  11. Hi from ICLW. Blogging is a good outlet for many of us.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Visiting from ICLw. So sorry things haven't gone well so far for you but glad you start blogging. It's such a great way to get a lot of this crap off your chest.

    ReplyDelete
  13. visiting from ICLW... blogging is an amazing thing, I started a new blog in year 5 of our ttc journey for #1 and it saw me through finally falling, pregnancy and the 19 failed and cancelled ART cycles of Project Sibling. Getting the crap out of my head and having the support of women who get my journey has been totally invaluable. I hope you have the same experience xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you so very much. i am really excited about this experience!

      Delete
  14. Just like you, we have never received any answers. Being left in the unexplained unknown and having to pull the big guns was hard. I hope you will find good, inspiring stories on this blogroll That was a sanity saver for me. #33

    ReplyDelete
  15. I am a new blogger too. (just since this summer to deal with my divorce) and I have yet to have a bad experience. I hope that the blogging community is just as great for you too!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Visiting from iclw. I'm still here with you in the two year club :( it's awful. Sounds like you have had a very long road. Unexplained is tough. You will be happy about this blog. Blogging has been so helpful to me.

    ReplyDelete
  17. hi from iclw!!! hope you enjoy the blogging world, i'm fairly new too :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. Best of luck to you on your journey.
    Love to see new bloggers. Keep with it and you will find tons of support.
    Visiting from ICLW (#7)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Greetings from ICLW! Welcome to the blogosphere! Starting a blog is one of the best things I've done in a while. I've found so much support here and I'm sure you will too!

    ReplyDelete